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Desdemona
Age:42
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New to town looking for cool female to hang out with

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Of course, I am for real and so is this ad. I do have pictures that I can trade after we talk a little more. Can't wait to meet you.

No really, anyone. I'm tall, thin, and hung. PLEASE INCLUDE A LITTLE ABOUT YOURSELF SOME PICTURES ON THE FIRST E-MAIL TO GET A RESPONSE My past monagamous relationships have taught me how to please a female and the experiences have opened my eyes to foreplay and what really makes a female get off. Would be nice tobe able to write cars, sports, movies, music, etc.

As a grown adult, this sounds crazy considering we have been taught how to socialize and make friends literally since kindergarten. We were all forced in a room and told to choose a desk and say hello to whoever was sitting next to us. From there, we were told to invite friends over for snacks and playtime and sleepovers. But while Hollywood likes to highlight these idyllic friendships over and over again with montages of cheesy music — in real life — this is actually pretty rare.

And even if we did, life still has a way of pulling people apart. I got four years with my high school friends while they had all been friends since the second grade. And while I had a blast in high school and definitely enjoyed myself — I could never compete. In fact, this has been the theme of my life. I have to admit, it still stings every time I see my old crews multiple on Facebook still attached at the hip a decade-plus later.

While I was off trying to create a new group of friends to hang out with somewhere else, they were continuing to nurture their longstanding bond. And thus, the pattern continued. In hindsight, I think I got so used to packing up after four years or so that I got restless after being somewhere for too long. Let me tell you — these moves are not conducive to consistent relationships.

Distance can be a slow poison for friendships. Over time, if not kept in check, it will erode the bond away until hardly anything is left.

Which leaves us here. Stuck, isolated, and lonely, wondering how the hell we ended up at age 26 without a group of friends. I get emails almost every day about this. This has been a huge struggle for me and still is.

But you know what? Someone has to talk about it. I know, this seems counterintuitive. Thanks for nothing, Kali. Keeping a few solid connections with older friends is going to give you more confidence to reach out to new friends. You need these happy memories and words of affirmation to keep you afloat. Old friends can provide that. I firmly believe in the importance of having that one anchored friend who is your ride or die.

But as you know, mine happens to live in San Antonio, about 2, miles away from me. So I have no choice but to find new friends if I want weekend plans from time to time. But Caroline has been a crazy strong source of confidence so I can reach out and attract great local friends. The focus here is to emphasize to yourself that you have a lot to offer to other people.

You are worthy of making new friends. But hang onto one or two of them to keep your friendship confidence at a healthy level. Personally, I have found this to be one of the best ways to create new female friendships. Instead of doing my own awkward, icky, vulnerable, uncomfortable dirty work — I pass it off to others. If you do not ask people to help set you up with other awesome women, it makes it a hell of a lot harder to find them.

When I moved to Los Angeles, I seriously almost only knew guys. Story of my life. So there I was, brand new to one of the largest cities in the world, and found myself in the comfort of boys, boys, boys.

I met my bff Ali Yes, Ali and Kali — meanttobe because she dates and is now engaged to a mutual friend from college, who also happens to be kewl. He met her, decided she was too kewl for him, and gave her to me. Instead they were all curated for me because I got over my pride and asked people for friends. These girls are gems. And I know that not only because I have excellent taste lol but because they were already vetted by people I trust.

They went to the same school. They worked at the same place. They were in the same club. They lived in the same neighborhood. In fact, sometimes this might feel like a huge stretch. I found that proposition to be very uncomfortable, but decided he was right so I did it anyway. Not going to lie, the response rate was not stellar.

Still waiting on a few to get back to me three years later, actually. And not only did she respond, but she met us for dinner that very weekend AND we are still close friends to this day. She was a year younger than me in our sorority and we probably only exchanged a few words to each other every semester while we were both in school! But we had that establishment in common, which meant we had people in common and a culture in common.

But we definitely needed it in the beginning to strengthen our friendship sea legs. So whenever you can, think about the loose connections you may have running around the town. So keep these things in mind…. A Make sure the general theme of the event is one that you are actually interested in.

Watching the game outside of your apartment and with a bunch of other Cowboys fans will inevitably lead to a few fun conversations, and maybe even a lasting friendship.

Focus on the theme of the event and you will most likely have a higher success rate. B Bring a friend if you can. Showing up alone can be so intimidating and it might suck the fun out of it. But if you are freaked out by the idea of showing up by yourself, make someone go with you so you can at least have a home base while you try to mingle with potential new besties.

If you meet someone cool at the event, exchange numbers right then and there. You may feel desperate or clingy, but a momentary feeling of desperation is better than a month of loneliness! Suck it up and close the deal! Chances are the other girls attending the networking event or meeting you for happy hour this evening are also gladly accepting new applications for friends, and they might be as lonely as you are.

So remind yourself again that you have plenty to offer, and go have some fun. She's also a blogger and a professional life coach at Blush Online Life Coaching.

In this detailed, type-based survival guide, seasoned MBTI author and shameless ENFP Heidi Priebe explains how to manage the ups, downs and inside-outs of everyday life as one of the most passionate yet self-contradictory types.

I feel like I need to reread it a time or three just to absorb all the information the author gives. A new Thought Catalog series exploring our connection to each other, our food, and where it comes from. Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday. You may unsubscribe at any time. By subscribing, you agree to the terms of our Privacy Statement.

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6 Apps for Making Friends in a New City | The Everygirl

The main cluster of trails is around the National Park HQ. These are all very pretty, peaceful and worthwhile treks of medium strenuousness. The trailhead is at the southern end of Vong Beach. This is a longer trek and will take at least a few hours for the round trip. On all of the trails, be careful in damp conditions, because the paths can become very slick.

Every year, tens of thousands of Vietnamese of all ages and backgrounds come on a pilgrimage of sorts, to pay their respects to the former inmates of the prisons, many of whom are considered great national heroes. Over 20, prisoners died on the island, either through malnutrition, disease, mistreatment or execution. Of course, this makes the prisons and associated sites a very sombre experience.

But, for a foreign visitor, it also gives you some historical perspective, and makes you appreciate how this island, which today appears to be the epitome of a tropical paradise, was a dark and hellish place for thousands of prisoners for over a century. There are several prisons on the island, all within walking distance of Con Son town.

Dating from French colonial times, visiting the prison complexes is a grim reminder of the brutal past. Strangely, the prison names in Vietnamese all translate rather romantically: Some of the prisons are grey concrete blocks; others look less threatening: But, one look inside the cells — at the horrific, green, corpse-like mannequins — brings home the reality of conditions here. The cowshed , for example, marks the mass grave where prisoners were massacred after a failed rebellion.

Hang Duong cemetery is where many of the prisoners who died on Con Son Island are laid to rest. There are also portraits of those who lost their lives on the islands, the most famous of whom was the 19 year-old, Vo Thi Sau. An independence activist from an early age, Vo Thi Sau was the first woman to be executed on the island. Candles and incense are lit on her grave, and offerings of flowers, fruits, combs and mirrors symbolizing her youth are laid on her tomb.

Foreign visitors are welcome, but make sure you dress and act respectfully no shorts or bare arms. There are historical sites scattered across Con Son Island, including overgrown French colonial villas.

As with all regions of Vietnam, there are folktales and myths surrounding the Con Dao Islands, some of which are intertwined with historical events. The story of Phi Yen is the tale that dominates Con Dao mythology, and there are several shrines and temples commemorating it. His body recovered and given burial on Con Son Island, Phi Yen spent her days grieving her son, eventually ending her own life by hanging.

The historical events in this folktale happened in the late 18th century, when a successful rebellion swept through Vietnam, but was ultimately quashed by emperor Nguyen Anh with French aid, thus ushering in the beginnings of French involvement in Vietnamese affairs, culminating in the French colonization of Vietnam, which began in and lasted until In the shade of a giant flame tree, the temple is short and stocky with a cool and breezy courtyard.

Guarded by two sculpted horses, this is also the tomb of the prince, whose grave is behind the shrine. The temple to Phi Yen known as An Son shrine is an attractive structure in a leafy courtyard. There are good views from the top out to sea and across the town. An impressive new temple dedicated to the men and women who were imprisoned and lost their lives on Con Son Island sits at the entrance to Hang Duong Cemetery.

And, at the northern end of the seafront promenade, a small, attractive temple to Vo Thi Sau stands in a tidy park, but was empty at my last visit. Con Dao offers by far the best diving in Vietnam. Other popular Vietnamese dive destinations, such as Nha Trang, pale in comparison. Although diving is possible year round, the best season is from March to June, when the water is clear and calm; November to January can get pretty choppy, and diving trips are always subject to conditions.

Sadly, Larry and his team from Dive, Dive, Dive! Apart from offering excellent diving trips, Larry was also very concerned and vocal about the marine and land environment of the Con Dao Archipelago. Obviously, this is very worrying, and something that all visitors to Con Dao should bear in mind. Diving trips are still available and the coral and marine life is still impressive enough to make it worthwhile, but overfishing, pollution, and general bad management are steadily taking their toll.

Con Dao Dive Center is now the go-to place for arranging a diving trip. For more information see their website and send them an email: A boat ride to Bay Canh Island the second largest in the archipelago is the most popular trip. Con Dao is well-known for its sea turtle nesting grounds. This has led to calls for visitors to boycott these trips as a demonstration against these practices. The market is currently being expanded and will soon occupy a large new building , as well as its present, Soviet-looking one.

For the time being, the main market is under a temporary roof called cho tam opposite the original market. However, you can still see fresh lobster and even the occasional shark. The number of places to stay on the Con Dao Islands has grown significantly over the last couple of years. There are now dozens of mini-hotels in Con Son town, all offering good budget-standard rooms, albeit at mid-range prices. All accommodation is on the main island of Con Son.

The following hotels in each category are listed in order of my own personal preference. All my reviews are independent and I never receive money in return for writing about a hotel. There are now two very luxurious resorts on Con Son Island: Poulo Condor Boutique and Six Senses: Located at the southern end of the long arcing sands of Vong Beach , Poulo Condor is just a couple of minutes drive from the airport, and the only accommodation on this side of the island.

For the time being, the resort has the entire beach to itself. The styling and decor are superb. The theme is French colonial: Inside, the rooms are very spacious and beautifully appointed, with wooden wardrobes and chests, rattan furniture and painted vases, tiled floors and stone verandas, rugs and lamps, shutters and blinds, expansive outside bathrooms and some rooms have private plunge pools.

Other facilities include an attractive infinity pool, spa, large gardens, restaurant and bar. The resort was carefully designed to have minimal impact on the natural surroundings on which it was constructed, which belongs to the national park. This means that the large trees and thick foliage on the beachfront have not been cut down to create sea views.

The resort consists of contemporary-looking private villas made entirely of wood, built along a lovely, long stretch of sand on Dat Doc Beach. The villas are pretty low-impact you can hardly see them from the road , very well-made, and all of them have ocean views and private plunge pools, as well as other smart little touches, such as in-room espresso machines.

Of course, all this luxury comes at a price: When I can afford it, I love staying in luxury resorts, and I have no qualms about paying hundreds of dollars for outstanding accommodation and service in amazing locations. However, as nice as the Six Senses is, its secluded location — over a headland and out of Con Son town — seems, to me at least, to be a disadvantage: But is it really worth the money, especially now that Poulo Condor offers tasteful luxury for a fraction of the price?

Pay a little extra for one of the sea view rooms, which have easily the best vistas over the bay of any accommodation on the island including the luxury options. It has addressed this by building a new wing, in which the rooms are clean, crisp and comfortable, although a bit more expensive than the old wing. The reception, lobby, restaurant and bar occupy a beautifully restored one-storey colonial villa leading onto a large courtyard with big tropical trees.

Rooms of which there are only a few, so book in advance to avoid disappointment are set off to the left of the main villa. Petite but thoughtfully and tastefully furnished, the decor is bright and fresh: The only thing Villa Maison lacks is a pool — how nice it would be to have a pretty infinity pool under those large trees in the courtyard. On the other hand, Con Son seafront which is great for swimming is just a couple minutes walk away.

This is a brilliant addition to the mid-range accommodation on the island. Large and nicely-made wooden bungalows are set under big trees right on the beach. The resort has recently expanded, adding slightly cheaper bungalows around a pretty vegetable garden. Inside, rooms are spacious if a little empty. K but loud music is occasionally played in the dining area. But, in my opinion, it has gotten a lot better in the last couple of years. The old wing is made up of single storey, restored French colonial bungalows; the new wing is a large four-storey building, which seems rather insensitive considering its low-rise neighbours.

The rooms in either wing are good but quite plain, as is the resort as a whole. The pool, however, is lovely. The resort was built practically on top of Phu Hai Prison , a rather strange and uncomfortable location: Saigon Con Dao is very popular with Vietnamese tour groups and can sometimes be fully booked for weeks. Rooms and prices vary but in general rooms are clean if a little soulless and without any frills and good value considering the oceanfront location.

One hopes that its future incarnation will preserve the colonial-era buildings on its land, and resist the temptation to build a multi-storey monstrosity. At the time of writing April they were a long way from reopening. Bright, clean, friendly and fresh, Lighthouse Boutique is good value, especially for couples. Rooms are smartly if sparsely decorated, including colourful tiled bathrooms and wooden touches here and there. This is good, solid flashpacker accommodation.

Rooms are a bit small but continue the purple theme with stripes on the wall. For their price and size, rooms are cozy, well-equipped and thoughtfully appointed. Of the mini-hotels that are popping up all over town, this is one of better ones. Apart from Thien Tan Hotel , this is the only relatively cheap accommodation right on the beach. However, the bungalows are showing their age or rather their cheap building materials and the place feels just a little bit run down these days.

With A-frame bungalows right on the beach, Con Dao Camping has a great location. Tea out front under the shade of trees is lovely. However, Phi Yen Hotel has since come under new management and the prices have gone up, but, thankfully, so has the quality. Previously a run-down guest house, Phi Yen has smartened itself up into a decent but plain budget mini-hotel.

Rooms and fairly bright and clean, although the renovations of a few years ago are already showing signs of age. But, for the price, its location is fantastic: These accommodations are all decent places to stay and popular with Vietnamese tour groups.

Sai Gon 68 is particularly clean and comfortable. Dozens of accommodations in the budget price bracket are dotted all over Con Son town and new ones are opening all the time. Apart from the ones listed above, there are several clusters of guest houses and mini-hotels that are worth checking out: The general standard of all these places is pretty good: Basic but clean, the larger rooms sleep up to 7 people, so they are good value for a group of budget travellers.

Hai Nga Mini-Hotel has cheap rooms, some sleeping up to 7 people. Caters mainly to Vietnamese officials and tour groups, but foreign guests are welcome. Good, new mini-hotel right by the market. Only a few rooms. There are now dozens of cheap, mini-hotels all around Con Son town, with good, clean rooms like this.

The seafront promenade is right in front of it. Decent budget options on the seafront promenade, although some rooms are dark and a bit run-down. And, as foreign travellers continue to trickle in, a few places now serve good Western food, not to mention the restaurants attached to the mid and high-end resorts. About a dozens vendors dish out classic Vietnamese noodle soups and drinks. The earlier you get here the better.

Not far from the market, Nhat Kieu is a noodle joint that could be straight from the mainland. Come here for breakfast. Attracting a youngish crowd of domestic travellers, Nguyen Binh serves fresh and reasonably priced shells.

There are dozens of them to choose from, all cooked in different ways with different sauces for more about how to order and what to eat at a shellfish eatery like this, take a look at my Shells Guide. This is a good substitute for the higher-priced seafood restaurants. There are several local rice eateries in Con Son town: Nho Oi is particularly good. Also in this area, a couple of streetside barbecues tempt passersby with grilled meats chicken, pork, duck, quail rotating over coals.

There are one or two other mini-marts around town now, too. A few small street food stalls line Nguyen An Ninh Street: The menu is short and exotic, and the food is fresh and delicious. Bring bug spray so as not to let the mosquitoes ruin a great meal. Thanh Huyen is a local restaurant on the edge of Con Son town, surrounded by lotus ponds.

This is the place to come for a seafood banquet. However, portions are large and, on my last visit, there were signs that quality is catching up to mainland standards. Be prepared to open your wallet if you really want to dine on the biggest, freshest fish here.

A popular place for international travellers to feast on seafood, Thu Ba is a foreigner-friendly restaurant with an English-language menu listing its extensive range of fish, shellfish, and classic Vietnamese dishes. There are a few good seafood restaurants in Con Son town, where fresh fish is aplenty.

As a rule, everyone likes Infiniti Cafe. It comes grilled or steamed or boiled with many marinades to choose from. The owners try to source as much as possible from the local area and focus of regional dishes, but there are also some European treats, such as cheeses and cold cuts. This is a shame, because the location is fantastic: Live seafood is displayed in an elaborate arrangement of water tanks: The beach bar is also nice for a cocktail.

Six Senses is the better of the two, but Poulo Condor is more affordable. A good variety of Vietnamese, Asian and European dishes are served at both.

This is because both these accommodations tend to attract a mainly Vietnamese crowd, and Vietnamese travelling groups are usually quite discerning about the quality of the food they eat.

This is the perfect place for lunch after a swim. Freshly grilled, inexpensive seafood right by the beach at Lang Dam Trau, near the airport. Read more about Cafe Infiniti here. Read more about Bar here. Interesting teas, juices and smoothies are available. Read more about Phien Khuc Cafe here. However, you may as well disregard Lacasa, because the owners are getting ready to close it and focus on expanding Villa Maison instead.

Therefore, in the near future at Villa Maison, you can look forward to loungers in the old stone courtyard under the branches of giant tropical trees, sipping signature cocktails made from island ingredients.

It attracts a local crowd, rather than tourists. Read more about Cafe Con Son here. Read more about Nice Cafe here. The walls are decorated with murals of the distinctive-looking Con Dao Market and propaganda posters, and the surfaces are embellished with old sewing machines, carved figurines and enamel cups.

Vietnamese-style coffee is very good here, and it attracts a friendly Vietnamese crowd Read more about Ba Le Cafe here. The location alone — on the wonderful seafront promenade in Con Son town — is enough to set it apart from others, but add to that the building — the perfectly proportioned old French customs house — and you have the makings of a fabulous cafe.

However, at the time of my last visit April , the cafe had closed but was due to reopen soon. Read more about Con Son Cafe here. The Six Senses bar used to have a great Happy Hour from pm. Drinks are good and fairly pricey , making this a decent option for a late afternoon gin and tonic on the way back from Dam Trau Beach.

However, non-guests need to inquire at reception before going to the bar: Tan Son Nhat has swings and chairs dotted on a patio under giant tropical almond trees with a selection of cocktails.

Con Dao Resort sports a gazebo by the sand in the shade of coconut palms with a short cocktail list. Take a seat on the wooden, metal, and plastic furniture under the branch of a frangipani or papaya tree and sip a strong Vietnamese coffee or refreshing juice.

Not long ago, the Con Dao Islands could only be reached by military helicopter. Cruise ships even make stops at Con Son occasionally. If you make a booking, I receive a small commission.

All my earnings go straight back into this website. Flights leave throughout the day. For those with limited time, the early morning departures from Saigon and the evening departures from Con Son are particularly good, because they allow you to have a full day on the island on both days of travel. However, flights to Con Dao are notoriously expensive and, in some cases, difficult to purchase.

The latter is true mostly on weekends and during public holidays, when flights are often completely sold out. Book early to avoid disappointment. Alternatively, you could buy two one-way tickets: All flights and flight combinations can be easily searched and booked on the Vietnam Airlines website: There are now two ferry connections between the mainland and Con Son Island: The former is long and fairly arduous, the latter is short and fairly easy: The ferry sails at least once daily in both directions an additional sailing is added on weekends and public holidays.

The voyage only takes hours depending on sea conditions, and the vessels are modern, fast, and comfortable. You can also take your motorbike or bicycle on board. A boat leaves several times a week one sailing every other day in each direction from Cat Lo port in the seaside town of Vung Tau, which itself can be easily reached by ferry from Saigon. Departure time the same in both directions is 5pm and the voyage takes roughly 12 hours, arriving at dawn.

There are some sleeping berths on board and even the coach-style seating cabins are air-conditioned. However, by far the most romantic introduction possible to the Con Dao Islands is arriving by boat at dawn in the beautiful surrounds of Ben Dam harbour. Tickets can be purchased at the either of the ports. Some additional information and contacts for booking tickets can be found here: Everywhere in town can be reached on foot.

Cycling is nice as the roads are all but empty and the scenery gorgeous. Bicycles can be hired from some accommodations on the island. This gives you the freedom to really explore the island: The well-maintained but empty roads give you all the space and time you need to get familiar with driving, although you must still be extremely cautious. These gas stations often close for lunch, so remember to fill up as soon as you get your scooter, and keep an eye on the fuel gauge so as not to run dry on the other side of the island.

However, I screwed up the details and so we found ourselves all dressed up with nowhere to go. If we had been all dressed up, we would have had more options.

Anyway, we tried to think of where we could go for a little fun, but we had a few criteria: There are tons of places in NYC that fit the first few criteria, but the last one is what stumped us. So, we thought of a few second-tier locales, but when we got to each of them it was a let-down: After the 4th or 5th place, we were starting to weary. Plus it was cold! Where can women of a certain age who are looking for a little action find men of a certain age?

Those days are done. When I was young er , this hunt was fun. That night, it felt ridiculous. Which is why Nameless insists on remaining that way. They make a statement… and a great gift! Just click the button at the top of this page. First off, Human Nature tries to protect us from the unknown and perhaps dangerous.

We, as humans, have Stranger Anxiety. That can take months or years or forever. STILL often quite attractive at 21, but less so. At 25, at 28, at 31, at Women, more so than men, look in the morning mirror at age whatever long past 18 and SEE themselves as they looked, or wanted to look, as a 21 year old. A guy wants to talk about himself, the conversation is done and over in a couple moments. Clothing that immediately blends in with the wallpaper. Sixth thing is most women past early adulthood are ANGRY the men interested in them are not rich and handsome.

These women withhold sex to punish the men who ARE interested in them. Seventh thing is most women P. Eighth thing is most women P. Ninth thing is, most woman P. Some are gracious, but none on Charming. Gracious women are frequent, Charming women are not to be found.

What a shame, what a waste of good material. Having said that, this doesnt mean that I am going to be politically correct on the expense of the truth. I am a young, tall, dark, and handsome man. I have absolutely no problem with women my age. I meet them on campus, work, social events, and online. The only issue I dislike about them is that they are not kinky in bed. What I have noticed is women, generally old women, who have some deficiencies tend to be do extra stuff in bed for her man.

Now here is the interesting part: I would never consider to establish a relationship with an older woman, even if she was the most beautiful and wealthiest in the society. This is because older women are fully aware that their market value in the dating scene has depreciated already; thus they are no longer the picky little young women that they once were. As a result of this attitude, I refuse to stoop to that level and establish a real relationship with a mature lady.

After that, she aims for the beta man and wants him to work hard for sex lmao and support her financially. Ladies, you have created this problem. Those are pretty harsh.. I do often wonder what they look like, though. The Spinsterlicious Life Round-up: Winners and Duds Eleanore Wells. I am a married 62 year old male. Of course, I second the motion regarding live music venues as good places to meet people.

Many men openly, and some, secretly, like BIG. There are countless websites extolling the virtues of older women, as well as larger women. Not that I would ever look at such things… This culture has to change, and women are going to be the ones who change it, whether we like it or not. I didn't think some men could stoop so low as to write some of the rubbish posted here.

Suffice it to say that when men start posting garbage about women's looks, it is usually a reflection of their own insecurities and unattractiveness…. I started reading this blog purely by accident — I was trying to get an idea for a funny text to send to my folks. With that said — Reza, bless your heart- I am SO overwhelmingly taken back by what you said in your post s on April 23, at Oh, how very inconsiderate of me…..

Do you kick puppies too? Steal candy from babies? I would say try the racetrack in summer or do dance classes in winter. But what do I know? I'm an older single guy. I got your back, Cinnamon Girl! I openly admit I don't have much of a dating history at 39 what can I say I guess other than that I never encountered many men in life who looked at me in a romantic sense I'm more comfortable now with myself at this age then when I was in my 20s.

Sorry Sidewinder and Anonymous but you need to own up to why you really pursue the youngsters. Why pursue a woman who could be your equal when you can buy one you can possibly control with your experience and money? Hope to encounter one some day although the comments made by Sidewinder and Anonymous make me realize sitting around watching Dish Network in the evenings might not be so bad after all….

I guess all men are perfect and all women are evil? No woman has ever had her heart broken by a bad guy, no men lie or cheat or are abusive. And surprise, it takes two. We were both responsible for the health and demise of our marriage. I am a curvy woman size I look good and dress well and appropriately for my age and size.

I find it's easy enough to meet men — they're everywhere. Smile, flirt and stike up a conversation for the fun of it. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. I do agree with Sidewinder's comments on being feminine and comfortable sexually.

In my case, these traits have been enhanced with time. The men I meet are more attracted to personality, confidence and sensuality than a tiny waist or perky boobs. I know the more superficial guys are out there, but I guess I'm not attracted to them, and vice versa. Oh, and PS gentleman — your money doesn't impress me, I have my own. I am established and successful in my career. Maybe you should consider what you can do to keep my interest; And catch any of the other single, successful and fabulous over 40 women out there!

Don't assume that women who write into this site instigated their divorces, snubbed nice guys or dated bad boys. Did it occur to you that some of these women are suddenly widows who are venturing back into the world of dating?

I'm willing to bet you're the man who lost a woman at some point on all 3 counts. Women divorce for various reasons — infidelity, abuse, finding out her hubby is gay, etc. Many married the good guys only to watch their marriages fail as years passed. Not all guys have been burned by women. Your comment certainly doesn't fit the men who married their first and only loves at the early ages of 18, 19, 20 and live to talk of their 50th wedding anniversaries…marrying at such young ages didn't give them time to be ripped apart by the opposite sex!

And sure the young women flock to the older, successful men like yourself. It's easy to mold and shape the young, immature, mind of a 21 year old college student. To them men in their 30s and 40s are Daddy figures. You can provide them with all of the securities a good father would provide his daughter.

Some women this age want what they can get from you until a better deal comes along. If guys their age had wealth to add to their ripe bodies older guys would be left hanging.

Play pauper for a day and find out how many of those pretty, nubile ladies would be at your side…think what you want about the ones who burned you but there are plenty of decent, middle-aged women who got raw deals. They are as deserving of the respect you middle-aged men seem to think only belong to the young women who pleasure you.

Such comments prove you are superficial. You're 35ish talking about the pleasures of loving a 21 year old. A 21 year old is green -she has not lived. At 21 I was in college trying to get a degree. When you're 40 and your love handles are potruding and you're losing hair will you get fat taken from your waist and hair plugs implanted?

When your biceps are gone will you work out harder or wear long sleeved shirts? We may not be as perky or as desireable in the eyes of our male counterparts but we are so much better than many of the women who came before us. We are individuals with so much to offer to men who don't waste their time chasing the Fountain of Youth. The smart men worth keeping know that you will never get your own youth back even if you find that fountain.

Both of you will see the days as well when you feel young, vibrant and healthy but have to work very hard to get the young, nubile women you so desire to see you the way you see yourselves.

After a while some people just get tired of it all. They just hang out at home, it's easier, and the things that used to be fun, aren't anymore. Similiar to co-workers I see nearing retirement age, they are burnt out on the whole thing, I think that happens regarding going out for a night on the town—once you hit 50 it all seems kinda of silly.

I think the ideas to join meet up groups to hike or bike make more sense. Ok — last one. LOL I recently went to a jazz club and it was filled with men in their 50s. Crowd was a little too old for me 39 , but that's where they are. I've met new female friends there and I'm sure they have singles meet up groups too.

I didn't take up golf until I got married, and usually I'm the only woman on the course. Sporting events, in general, are good places to meet men. Again, I didn't realize this until I got married. As a single woman I didn't think about sports. Something is getting lost in translation here. You are looking for men who are seeking primarily a friend and companion.

I doubt you're looking to have more kids and I doubt you're in the market for men in their 30s and early 40s. If older than 31, then I really don't care if she's 34 or 38…at that point I'm evaluating her as a companion and if the 38 year old is better looking with a better attitude, I'm going with her.

It sounds like you look pretty good for your age, so I think men would potentially be in play for you. But just as you look and act younger than your age, don't assume that there aren't attractive men in their 60s that you might like. I'm 53 and widowed with two teenagers. I made what I thought were the right choices and then my husband died of cancer on me four years ago, so so much for that.

I'm not dating men that are 10 years older than me. I haven't found a single man who was 60 interesting.. And as for the younger men who think they can bed me and throw me to the curb afterwards, I wish them luck. I'm not that desperate. I'm not fat, ugly, or have wrinkled skin either. Stop overpaying the banks: Make your home work for you with a home equity loan.

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It's time to get out there and meet new people, new women especially. these venues are not necessarily out looking to meet the love of their life. Coffee shops are awesome places to meet women, especially during the daytime. just hanging out than someone who's clearly on their way to something. I'd be glad to make new friends and let u discover my city: Milano!! i'm in.i'm a very multicultural girl and i love hanging out with expats. i have. Let's say I'd love to have a morning coffee or hang out on Friday evening. to do and does very well as you can setup your search for events to attend before you travel; join Cool Cousin Definitely a great way to meet people in a new city.